LaShell Interview – Shortened & Clean Transcript
Danielle: LaShell Wooten, thank you so much for being here and joining me on Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs today.
LaShell: Thank you for having me. I can’t wait for this conversation.
Danielle: Me too. I want to start with how we know each other. I had just gone back to work after having my first baby—about four and a half years ago. A friend had seen you for coaching, recommended you, and it just felt right.
I really want listeners to notice that phrase: it felt right. That’s been the through line of what it’s like to work with you—from that very first call.
I didn’t overthink it. I signed up. And what I remember so vividly was how joyful, encouraging, and simple you made the conversation feel.
My internal voice is hard on me, so I expect wisdom to be hard on me. You were the opposite. On that first call, you asked me such a simple question that I couldn’t answer:
“When you wake up in the morning, describe your ideal day.”
My bar was so low. You gently scaled it back even more:
“What are the first two things you want to do when you open your eyes, before your feet hit the floor?”
I still come back to that exercise.
I just want to say publicly—thank you. I’m so excited for everyone listening to get to learn from you, because what I’ve learned working with you is that you can create a life you love, and you can also love the process of creating it.
LaShell: The process is such a big part of the life.
Danielle: The process is the life.
LaShell: It is the life. We separate the two. We think, “I’ll just get through the hard part, then I’ll have the life I want.” I’m like—no, the process is the life.
Danielle: I’ve definitely fallen into that: “Once I get to X, then I’ll feel Y.” But you’ve helped me start enjoying the journey. Even today—this is an interview, not a coaching call—but I can already feel myself flexing that “enjoy-the-process” muscle.
Okay, so: you started your professional life in the music industry. That is such a cool beginning. You were a publicist for Mary J. Blige, Jodeci, and En Vogue—to name a few.
Little LaShell from the Bronx ends up in the music industry. Can you take us back there?
From Floating Into Music to Finding Her Blueprint
LaShell: I graduated from high school thinking my dream job was working at Baskin Robbins or McDonald’s—because I loved fries and ice cream. My dad was like, “Cute, but no. You’re going to college.”
I went to a small Catholic college in New Jersey. The basketball team went to the NCAA finals, the school got a lot of attention, and they decided to double tuition. Meanwhile I’d been mostly social, not academic. I couldn’t ask my parents to pay double for C grades, so I left after my sophomore year, planning to “figure it out.”
Two weeks later, one of my mom’s friends said, “I work for a temp agency—do you want a job?” I took the typing test and got placed as a floating receptionist at a record company. I was covering for a receptionist who was out sick. At the end of the week, the head of HR said, “I’d like to hire you full-time as a floater.”
After about a month, I got hired full-time in the publicity department as an assistant. That’s how my decade-long career in music started. I just floated into it.
Danielle: I love that—“floated into it.” That’s how I became a ballroom dance teacher too. I thought I’d move to LA and “bust into the industry” as an actor. I went to LA, got major culture shock, moved back in with my parents with so much shame.
My parents, who met as dance instructors, said, “Why don’t you just join our friends’ studio training class and see if you like it?” Seven years later, I was still there—teaching ballroom.
I floated into that, just like you floated into music. And hearing you say it out loud, I’m realizing… I’ve often interpreted “floating” as failing. As if, because I wasn’t grinding, I wasn’t earning it.
I hope anyone listening who’s in that season of “floating” can welcome it—like stepping gently from lily pad to lily pad. There would’ve been so much more pleasure on the ride if I’d allowed that sooner.
I’m claiming this for my 2026 self: I’m allowed to float through life. And that’s not a failure.
LaShell: It’s actually the win. Efforting is for the birds. There is a place for effort, but what I teach is this:
Your effort should be focused on discovering what you desire.
Accessing what you desire should feel more like floating.
Once you get really clear on what you want—and I mean feel it, not just think it—the universe starts to conspire to bring it to you.
Your Emotions as GPS
Danielle: You talk a lot about emotional intelligence being your compass, and you have a book called GPS Your Life. Can you say more about that?
LaShell: When actual GPS came into our lives—like the thing in our cars—it gave me the perfect metaphor.
All you have to do is tell it where you want to go. Then it gives you the best route, and your only job is to follow it. That’s how I see life.
Our emotions are like our internal GPS. Our real “work” is to feel our way into what we want—not overthink it with endless pros/cons lists.
You see someone doing something, you imagine yourself doing it, and if your whole body lights up? That’s your GPS saying, “Yes, this way.”
Sometimes that route is the highway—fast, direct, maybe with some traffic and delays. Sometimes it’s the scenic route. Either way, the GPS sees the whole picture. We only see the parking lot we’re sitting in.
We get into trouble when we argue with the GPS. “Why is it putting me on this road? I think I should go another way.” We do the same thing with our desires: “This doesn’t feel familiar, so it must be wrong,” when really, it’s just new.
How Coaching with LaShell Feels
Danielle: That’s exactly what it’s like working with you. Our sessions aren’t weekly or super rigid. After the first one, I said, “Okay, when do I need to rebook?” And you said, “Why don’t you wait… and float back in when it feels right.”
The good student in me was like: “I have the freedom to just do this whenever I want?”
I take pages of notes, but the real magic is that three months after I get clear with you about two or three things, they start unfolding.
A great example: about two years ago, the podcast was feeling like a grind. I wanted help lifting the production load. You gave me a few gentle ideas—“What if you just tried this? What if you just explored that?”—and it sounded almost too simple.
Within a week, a wonderful person appeared and started producing my podcast. I honestly think that kept me from quitting altogether.
So you keep reminding me, over and over: “You can do anything you want.”
And every time I go, “I can’t…,” then I remember, “Wait. I actually can.”
LaShell: It’s a muscle. And I like to help people build it in tiny, practical ways. My favorite entry points are silverware and socks.
I’ll say, “Do you like your silverware?” Most people say no. “Okay, then why don’t you go buy silverware you do like? It doesn’t have to be expensive. But you also don’t have to keep Aunt Sylvia’s heavy, ornate set if it’s not your style.”
You eat multiple times a day. Imagine every meal being a tiny moment that feels like you.
Same with socks: Do they feel good? Do they have holes? Are you telling yourself, “I’m saving for something else, so I’ll just make do”?
I don’t believe any of us are here to “make do.” We are here to express what we desire—and then engage with it when it shows up.
The Usher Story: A Megastar as a GPS Detour
Danielle: We have to talk about Usher. Because your shift into coaching had something to do with that Usher.
LaShell: Yes. That Usher.
I had left the music industry around the early 2000s and was deep into social work and therapy. About 14–16 years later, a good friend from my music days called me. She was managing artists and said, “I don’t understand millennials. I need help.”
At the time, I had a full-time job I actually loved—but I had been feeling for about a year that the chapter was over. I wanted more freedom, more of my own time, less commuting, less repetition.
I started job hunting. On paper I was a perfect match for multiple roles—some places even invited me to apply—and still, nothing. Not even a callback.
A younger version of me might have made that mean, “Something’s wrong with me.” But instead I thought, Wait. I’m at my most amazing as the person I am right now. If none of these doors are opening, maybe I’m just not meant to go down those roads.
So I stopped personalizing it and started listening.
Then my friend called and said, “Can you leave your 15-year career and come help me support a megastar?” More money, more flexibility, and the freedom I’d been craving. She didn’t even know I’d been job hunting.
There wasn’t any coaching involved yet—just coordinating his world. I did it for about six months. But while I was working for him, I suddenly had time. Old clients started asking, “Can I pay you to coach me?” My coaching practice began to grow alongside that job.
So Usher wasn’t the destination. He was a cooperative component—a step on the route—to the real address in my GPS: full-time coaching.
Deal or No Deal Island: From Floating to Flying
Danielle: Okay, plot twist: you also ended up on Deal or No Deal Island. And what I remember is that you kind of stumbled into that too.
LaShell: Completely.
I loved the original Deal or No Deal with Howie Mandel and the briefcases. Years later, I saw an ad for Deal or No Deal Island and DVR’d it. Months went by. The whole season recorded, and every time I went into my DVR, I watched everything except that show.
Finally, one day, it was the only thing left. I turned on episode one, trying to understand why people were in the jungle. I wasn’t really into it.
During a commercial, I saw: “If you want to be on the show, go to this website.” I was curious how they cast people, so I pulled up the form on my phone in the dark in my pajamas. Name, email, city, state. Then a bunch of questions you weren’t allowed to skip.
I didn’t want to seriously apply. I was just nosy. So I was writing silly answers like, “What’s your biggest fear?” “Why would I tell you that? LOL.”
Then it asked for a 30-second video: “Tell us why you want to be on the show.” I literally said, “I don’t want to be on your show. I don’t understand your show. I liked the old one.”
Hit submit. It said, “Thanks for your submission.” I laughed and went on with my life.
They called me the next morning.
I was heading to my son’s college graduation. The casting producer begged me to talk. I said, “I’ll be gone for a week.” She said, “I’ll call you in a week.” She did. She emailed, called, texted—relentless.
I kept saying, “I don’t want to do your show.” She said, “Please, just do a 15-minute Zoom, or I’m going to look bad at my job.” So I did the Zoom, still telling them I didn’t really get the show.
Then NBC called. Then they asked me to take a physical. Fill out more forms. Each time I thought, This is where it ends. And each time, the doors just… kept opening.
At some point I caught myself resisting and thought, Wait. This is exactly like the GPS metaphor. Every door is opening easily. Maybe I should stop fighting and just follow it until it ends.
And we all know how that went—I ended up on national TV, swinging through jungles, swimming through swamps, doing all kinds of things that were nowhere on my 2024 vision board.
What did it give me? Two big things:
- It’s opening doors I probably haven’t even reached yet.
- It showed me a new level of fearlessness and freedom I didn’t know I had.
I already thought I was pretty free. Doing that show showed me—nope, there’s even more. There is always more.
I went from floating to flying. And flying is a lot of fun.
Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs (…or Glue Your Own Nails)
Danielle: I love that. Okay, as we wrap up, I ask every guest this: What’s your Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs moment?
LaShell: I have a literal one. It’s actually more “Don’t glue your own nails.”
When I was 18, I had fake tips for New Year’s. My pinkies were painted gold, the rest French tips. I woke up New Year’s morning and one of the gold nails was lifting.
Instead of going back to the salon, I grabbed Crazy Glue. I tried to squeeze it under the nail. The glue had that dried film around the top, so instead of coming out the tip, it shot out a side pocket—straight into my eye.
I slammed my eye shut on instinct. When I tried to move, I realized my hand was glued to my face.
My parents were hungover down the hall. My little sister had to wake them up and say, “Shell got glue in her eye…”
Long story short: they got me to the ER, where doctors literally didn’t know what to do. They flushed my eye for hours with warm saline. The glue had formed a sort of Crazy Glue contact lens. Eventually, with time and my own body heat, the glue melted. Miraculously, my vision wasn’t damaged.
So, my literal Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs story is:
Don’t glue your own nails.
When you feel resistance, stop.
In life or with Crazy Glue.
Cream Sweaters, the Algorithm & Holiday Season Feelings
Danielle: That “when you feel resistance, stop” line… I feel that.
Recently, I did a closet overhaul with a stylist friend. My closet, like most people’s, is basically a time capsule: blazer era, ballroom dance era, etc. I wanted clothes that celebrate who I am now.
But I am extremely influenceable—especially when I’m tired and scrolling. The algorithm knows my weak spot: a loose cream cable-knit sweater, a woman with effortless hair, holding a mug. She looks cozy and chic, and you can’t tell if she’s at home or out on a date. And I always think, I want that life, and then I buy the sweater.
I finally had to tell myself: “You do not have permission to buy another cream sweater right now.” Because the truth is—I don’t want the sweater. I want the feeling.
LaShell: Exactly. She’s selling the feeling of comfort and ease.
A powerful question you can ask yourself is:
“What can I access in my life that will give me this feeling—without buying anything new?”
Sometimes it’s as simple as changing the next hour. Light a candle. Put on the “special” perfume on a regular Tuesday. Go get a blowout instead of another sweater.
The sweater is just one possible prop. The feeling is what you’re really after.
Danielle: Yes. And that feels especially important during the holidays, when we’re being sold more than ever on things we didn’t know we “needed.”
I’m not swearing off buying myself anything. But I am committing to asking:
“Is it the sweater I want, or the feeling I imagine it will give me?”
And if it’s the feeling… what else can I do, right now, to give that to myself?
LaShell: Exactly.
Danielle: Thank you. This was so lovely. Thank you for being here.
LaShell: Thank you for having me.
