Reimagining Jan 2026: Reflection and Bangs

Reimagining Jan 2026: Reflection and Bangs

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[00:00:07] Hello? Hello, hello. Welcome and happy New Year to the first episode of Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs in 2026. I. I’m truly so excited to be here and honestly, it felt like a photo finish, like a race to the finish line to get this done. I am recording and releasing this episode on the same day. I’ve never done that before, but that is just what this episode took.

[00:00:33] I had different childcare, I had different things lined up for the last three weeks to get super ahead of the game, and that just wasn’t in. Life’s plan for me. but that’s okay. We’re embracing the messy middle. We’re here, we’re doing it. And I’m truly excited to be here with you.

[00:00:49] As I said in the last episode of 2025, that this episode was gonna feel a little different and it already does feel different, so at least I’m true to my word. I wanted to start off. With settling into something that I’ve long since believed about the new year, but I think the best lessons often bear repeating, and I am reminding myself of this, this time in real time with you, that these first few weeks of a new year, they’re not a time for reinvention.

[00:01:22] They’re a time for reflection and reimagining. It’s such a great way to, as we, you know, we, we closed another lap around the sun. We made it and. Thinking back of what did this year bring me, what did I gain from this year? What did I lose this year? What am I ready to let go from last year that’s, I don’t wanna bring into this next year and or what do I want to continue the, it’s such a great, great time for reflection and coming out of.

[00:01:56] The energy, the buzz, the consumption, the fatigue, the celebration, like whatever, whatever your December was for you coming into January. I, I am inviting for myself and anybody who wants to join me to really ease into this new year, to reflect, to reimagine what you want this next year to unfold and bring for you.

[00:02:23] And to maybe take a pause on the resolutions, take a pause on trying to completely start over and reinvent yourself because the. Probability is, and this is somebody who, I’m a big dreamer. I love dreaming big. You’re gonna carry you with you unless you set some very in clear intentions for yourself, you’re gonna likely be more like you were before than brand new.

[00:02:52] And that’s okay. ’cause you’re great. You don’t need, you don’t need to completely start from scratch. But I thought that this could be. A great way to reintroduce the podcast to reflect on where the podcast has been and then reimagine where I wanna take it moving forward and where we can grow as a community within the podcast.

[00:03:12] So just to reintroduce myself, my name is Danielle Ireland. when I think about everything that has happened to me before that led me here, the things that matter that I really feel like. I’m starting to reacquaint myself with and reimagine for myself creatively like how I live creatively. I have always loved any form of creative expression.

[00:03:39] telling stories, writing stories, coloring, dancing, moving, daydreaming. I loved. All of that. And then as I moved through the world, through school and through college, I, I felt my creative self, but up against what I felt was either required of me to be a good student, what was expected of me to be a sturdy, stable adult, and this tension or this push pull between who I am, who I wanted to be, and who I thought I should be.

[00:04:13] Was the real origin, I think, of a lot of confusion, learning and unlearning processes for me, and that is, I think, in the simplest form, a big part of what. Ignited my spark to even start the podcast. Years ago I was working as a ballroom dance instructor for about seven years and knew that I was ready to make a change.

[00:04:38] My personal life, I was engaged and I was, you know, beginning that whole process of who am I as a wife, who do I wanna be as a wife, and what’s motherhood gonna look like? But as I was nearing this next stage in life that I really was excited to step into. What became so clear and apparent to me was that I hadn’t done a lot of internal investigating of who I wanted to be in the world.

[00:05:03] What space did I wanna claim that was mine that I wasn’t sharing with anybody? how did I wanna spend my days? it makes me think about this. I think it was Louise Hay. She had a quote that, what if the rest of your life was the best of your life? And so I wanted to essentially look at.

[00:05:20] That point in time and think, okay, I’m about to make a really big commitment. What commitments do I need to make to myself to stay true to myself? Within this commitment of marriage, of motherhood, of all these things that I knew were eventually coming down the pipeline that started off as a really beautiful intention, but what also happened is that intention of wanting to really get clear about.

[00:05:42] Who I am and what mattered to me and what I wanted to commit my days to. And also the reality of, oh, eventually kids are probably gonna be in the picture and you’re going to be a wife. And what the hell does that even mean? those two sandwich slices combined, really pushed together and created, I’ll say a heightened sense of tension and fear and stress.

[00:06:06] That I experienced as anxiety that I, probably for the first time very acutely in my life, I really felt anxiety. I experienced burnout. I felt every day like this huge sense of. What I realize now is all honestly a result of vulnerability. But I felt this overwhelming sense of, oh my God, I’ve just declared something I want.

[00:06:32] I’m taking a step towards that. I am investing time and money into making this happen. Holy shit. What if it doesn’t work out and isn’t that. Always what vulnerability comes down to. I’m going to ask someone to the dance, ask someone to date. I’m gonna make some art and I’m gonna show it to somebody.

[00:06:53] What if it gets rejected? What if nobody cares? What if nobody says anything? Right? There’s only a million examples of what can elicit vulnerability, but That experience of pressure, a timeline, clear goals, vulnerability and anxiety, that little constellation of experiences for me really pressed onto something true to me that I would sort of forget and remember and forget and remember that when I am engaged in creativity, all of that noise really calms down.

[00:07:28] The decisions in my life become clearer. And what I didn’t know then, that I can see so clearly now is that was when I decided to make a podcast. But at the time, I would’ve told you, I have no idea why. But a part of me obviously knew, a part of me knew you need to make something. You need to make something that is not for profit, a product that is not, that doesn’t serve anything other than servicing your creativity.

[00:07:54] And that’s how the podcast started. I declared I was going to make it almost as soon as I graduated with my master’s degree and started working as a therapist. And I was so creatively dehydrated. I was so parched because I was living in a very cerebral, concrete, very mathy part of my brain. What I needed was an outlet.

[00:08:17] So I launched the podcast not really knowing or having any expectation of it other than I was gonna make it. And then I played with it for a couple of years, albeit inconsistently. I tried releasing in seasons, I tried releasing, once a week, every week for a year.

[00:08:35] And I did that. And after. About year two and a half, like around the two and a half, three year mark, the podcast actually started to become something people were paying attention to, almost to my surprise. And it was also at that time that I became pregnant with my daughter, who’s now four.

[00:08:51] So the podcast has had a journey. It’s taken some time. And this last year I found myself literally in 2025, a mother of two. My son had turned to, and I found myself as life has a tendency to do until we really, really learn a lesson, the lesson’s gonna keep representing itself to us.

[00:09:10] I found myself. Really missing that creative spark that I needed to make something. I had published a children’s book called Wrestling a Walrus for little people with big Feelings. That was another really big catalyst. That happened in March of 2025. I self-published a children’s book. It’s out there in the world.

[00:09:34] It exists. You can find it on Amazon and Barnes and noble.com. But in the process of making that, what I realized was. I need to keep making something. My work as a therapist is still very much alive. I still have a thriving practice. I still love the clients that I work with.

[00:09:51] I’m just not necessarily looking to grow that part of my life or add more to that. What I want to really inject. More energy, more time, more thoughtfulness and develop is this space I am getting feedback from people that are listening, that are feeling encouraged, that are feeling hopeful, and that that is the juice, that is the, that is the joy.

[00:10:18] And I made a commitment when I wrote my children’s book. The way I wanted to feel when I made it was joyful. And the way that I wanted the reader to experience it was joyful.

[00:10:28] And that made every decision that I made after that so clear. Because if it wasn’t that, then it wasn’t right. If it wasn’t joy, it wasn’t right. And here I sit. In six months into this recommitted process with the podcast, and I’m finding myself making a similar declaration that I want the process of making this to feel joyful.

[00:10:47] And I want the experience of engaging with it as often as possible to also feel joyful and that renewed clarity feels so good. So who is this podcast for? And. If you’ve been listening for a while, maybe you already know. If you’re new, let’s talk about it. I believe that this podcast is for anybody who is wanting to answer the question of, do I need bangs or do I really need to talk about my feelings?

[00:11:18] This podcast is a community, it’s a conversation and it’s a place for us to let our tender vulnerable selves exist to ask better questions so that we can get more meaningful answers and we can take that information and help us move through the world with a little bit more grace, a little bit more confidence, and a little bit more clarity.

[00:11:39] This podcast is for anybody who is wanting to feel a little less alone, a little bit more hopeful, and maybe, maybe you are answering your own question or your own version of the question, do I really want bangs?

[00:11:53] Or do I need to talk about my feelings? Because I think we all find ourselves in moments whether we’re about to make a purchase. Do I need this other sweater or do I need a hug? Do I really need to eat this thing, drink that wine, or do I need to maybe write in my journal? And honestly, sometimes the answer could be any combination of the following.

[00:12:14] I actually have quite a few people who hear an episode of my podcast and wanna tell me that they love their bangs. This is not a knock on bangs. This is a call to somebody who is looking to shift how they feel about themselves in the world, that wanna feel a little bit more solid, a little bit more grounded, and also just to have more fun along the way.

[00:12:39] One of the greatest gifts I have working as a therapist is that I get to hear. People’s most intimate thoughts, knowing that I’m also getting a version of that intimacy. Having worked with therapists myself, there’s the level of vulnerability and openness that I can reveal in a therapy room and. Then there’s even another layer beneath that.

[00:13:01] There’s things that I may only feel comfortable revealing in a journal, and then there’s things that I maybe only feel comfortable keeping in my own mind that I don’t actually say aloud or maybe it’s a thought I take on a walk that lands on nobody’s ears, but the trees and birds. All that to say I have been given the gift of people revealing incredibly tender, painful, raw, real elements, stories, experiences in their life.

[00:13:27] And the benefit of that, while some people may think that may sound heavy, the benefit and the gift of that is that I know firsthand in a way that I always assumed, but know in such a deeper way that what we are looking for in life, what we’re wanting to feel, or what we’re struggling with, where we’re doubting ourselves. It is the same.

[00:13:50] The things we fear, the things we feel, what we want for ourselves in life. It is the same. There is this beautiful common thread. We are not unique in the things that we want in life, and thank God because terminal uniqueness can keep us so silent and alone where we don’t need to be.

[00:14:12] Silent and we don’t need to be alone because we’re not. And so that is the hope with this community is that we can allow space for those parts of ourselves to exist, to be revealed, to heal, to transform and feel better.

[00:14:27] The world is noisy. There are a lot of opinions, news, entertainment, distractions, things to buy, things to do, things to check off the list, and my hope is that this space, this podcast space, is a cozy corner where we can breathe a little deeper, share with each other and laugh along the way.

[00:14:43] This is not a place where you wanna come if you want to attack your goals. But rather commit to what’s important to you. This is not where we are gonna compare and despair, but rather look at who is beside us, Or maybe look at who’s behind us and offer a hand. I am committed to connecting with you this year. And really developing a deeper conversation with you. I wanna give you my email address and say, put in the subject line bangs.

[00:15:13] If you have a question for the podcast, if you have something you want talked about, if you have a personal experience that you’re like, Danielle, what? What would you say about this? The truth is, I don’t know exactly what questions are the right questions for this and what questions may not be, but we can figure it out together and.

[00:15:32] The other thing is I will respond to you. You can email me at da******@*************nd.com, subject line bangs. This is where you can maybe ask a question. what I can guarantee you, you are not the only one who has it. You’re not the only one who’s thought it. It’s a place where we can really cultivate a dialogue together, where we can grow this conversation together, where we can grow this community together.

[00:15:55] And I truly believe this, at the bottom of my heart, the best things in life are shared. When we feel enthusiasm, we wanna turn to someone and say, oh my gosh, you felt that too, or, I thought it was just me or. You’ve had that experience. I’ve had that experience. I never thought I would ever be able to say this out loud, but here it is, and that is where transformation and healing happens, friends.

[00:16:16] So let’s really do that together.

[00:16:18] I’m going to be inviting some new and incredible guests this year, and also welcoming back some familiar friends of the podcast if you’ve been listening for a while.

[00:16:26] And then using our solo cast to take a more intimate look at resources, processes, places, and tools that I am currently loving to make life feel a little easier and a little lighter. I am so glad you’re here. Welcome back to Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs. Cheers to making it to 2026. That was no small feat.

[00:16:47] Last year was a doozy and uh, we made another lap around the sun. And to that end of thinking of the sun and space and what actually, how we actually define a calendar year. I wanted to offer a little bit of A sciencey nugget. ’cause I think this is just a fun factoid that I’ve had on a post-it for almost a year thinking I would do something with it.

[00:17:07] And I don’t really know what to do with it other than just share it with you here. So I’m gonna talk to you a little bit before signing off about the Andromeda Paradox. This was something I heard Neil deGrasse Tyson explaining and it just, it blew my mind, but it was like a little mini. Whoa. That’s amazing.

[00:17:25] That that is a thing that exists and there’s a name for it. So the Andreina paradox is that motion changes your perception of time. And they had all these different examples of how you could experience this and how it could be experienced in theory. But again, I am not a scientist. I am not a physicist.

[00:17:44] I just find it fascinating and interesting. And what I love is when science meets. The emotional experience, the human experience. it’s exciting to think that there is this language of how the world works that’s unfolding and we’re discovering all the time. in thinking about it from an emotional experience, emotion changes your perception of time,

[00:18:06] In terms of stillness and mindfulness, as well as what happens when we are anxious and overstimulated. When we are anxious and overstimulated, it’s hard to settle to slow. We’re more likely to fidget, we’re more likely to invite more stimulus through our phones or through to-do lists or busying ourselves with tasks which are never gonna come in short supply.

[00:18:30] There will always be more to do. we may over caffeinate or anything else that’s just gonna really make us feel buzzy because that in some ways is our nervous system’s baseline. When we’re overstimulated or burnt out, that can affect our experience of time, how we actually experience time. it’s in days where I’ve been buzzing in my head or have racing thoughts, or have just felt really juiced up, not in an exciting way, but in a spiraling and spinning out way.

[00:18:58] It’s those days where I’ll sit down to do a task and blink, and then it’s three 30 in the afternoon, and I have no idea where those five and a half hours went, and I haven’t cared for myself the way that I need to. It’s likely that I wasn’t hydrating, I wasn’t eating properly, and then I’m buzzy and fidgety and anxious, and it just creates this chain reaction that it, I can definitely attest, is not in service of me.

[00:19:26] Mindfulness when I am slow and still, or I take a deep breath outside, slowing myself down, makes time feel like it’s slowing down. My experience of time is different. I feel like my calendar expands. The ticking of the clock slows down, and there’s more that I’m able to do. It reminds me actually, of an exercise, a friend of mine.

[00:19:53] Invited back when I was in grad school and it felt like there was this never ending list of things to do or things to read, or things I could be doing. And I, I don’t know if anybody else felt like this when they were in school, but syllabus or a syllabi, I don’t actually know the proper context of how I’m using it.

[00:20:12] My English people can tell me my English nerds, but I remember. Seeing that list of all the things that needed to get done between day one and the end of the semester, and it just perpetuated this feeling of there’s always something I need to be doing. And it felt at the time, near impossible for me to slow down and stop because as soon as I got one task done, there were 50 more tasks on their way to a 50 page paper and a thesis and blah, blah, blah.

[00:20:37] So. Life in its own way. It’s like this never ending syllabus. There’s always a final exam coming up and, uh, you know, a midterm coming up. And that pressure feels really acute. and what my friend invited for me to practice during that time, and it’s something I still use in so many ways today that I will set a timer.

[00:20:58] For my task. So you know, she said just set a 30 minute timer, set a 40 minute timer. Or sometimes I would even do an obscure time, like 44 minutes. I don’t know why, but being silly and playful in that way kind of helped. But I would set a timer. And for only that chunk of time, I would sit with the one task that was stressing me out the most, whether it was sitting down and actually reading something that I needed to read, sitting down and responding to an email that I needed to answer.

[00:21:26] But I would set the timer and then I knew that the timer was taking care of me. I didn’t need to look at a clock. I didn’t need to be doing anything else, but I would only and singularly do this one thing, and before I knew it. I would begin moving with the task. The timer would go off, and almost always, I got more done than I would’ve ever imagined I did.

[00:21:49] Again, it felt like time expanded. It felt like time slowed down, but my processing speed was quicker. My experience of time was completely different. My experience with productivity was completely different, but the only thing that shifted really was my focus. And so I just wanna invite that concept to you, however you may wanna use it or not, that there is an actual phenomenon in physics called the Andromeda Paradox, and that motion changes your experience of time.

[00:22:18] So if you feel like you need time to slow down, or if you want time to speed up, you can actually shift your experience of time through motion, whether that’s mental motion or physical motion. I just think that’s endlessly fascinating and I’ll probably keep nerding out about it and talking about it and finding other ways to incorporate it too.

[00:22:38] Because it’s fun. And the more we talk about it, the more we practice it, the better we get and the more we learn, and then we can ask more fun questions. Thank you so much for being here with me. Thank you for sharing this space.

[00:22:49] I look forward to continuing along with you and growing alongside you and just continuing to forge, a new path together. Thank you for being here, and I hope that you continue to have an incredible day.

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